Conflicts are a natural part of family life. However, you can learn how to manage conflicts in a way that meets everyone's needs. Nonviolent Communication (NVC) is a great tool for building respect, cooperation, and harmony in your family’s communication. 

Here is a short video about how you can get started communicating nonviolently with your child.

Self-compassion is being compassionate towards yourself. It is not selfishness, but a recognition that oneself is worthy of love, also when making mistakes or suffering. Treat yourself as you would treat a dear friend, and remember that you are not alone. Everyone makes mistakes and feels horrible sometimes. 

Being compassionate towards oneself is not easy, but it is something you can practice! Here you can find guided practices and exercises.

According to the theory of growth mindset, by Carol Dweck, children’s belief about intelligence affects both learning and motivation. Roughly put, children who believe that intelligence is malleable, tend to work harder to achieve something and use better strategies when learning -because they believe that they can learn! On the other hand, children who think that intelligence is fixed, tend to avoid challenges and feel more helpless when facing obstacles -because they don’t know that they have the ability to overcome them.

How can you as a parent foster a growth mindset for your child? Parents’ belief about how a child is motivated seem to be the most prominent factor that influences children’s mindset. Take a moment to reflect over how you think your child is motivated? What you say and how you act guide children to either focusing on their performance and abilities, or on learning. Embrace your own mistakes as opportunities to learn (not failures) and you will help your kids develop a growth mindset (and you may even do that too!). In fact, being imperfect and also showing it may be the best thing you can do for your child!

How is technology, mobile phones, and social media affecting children’s development and learning, and how can you manage your child’s screen time? Iparentgen seeks to answer these questions and supports you in raising your child in the age of technology.

Make a choice to see the good in your child, and around your child. Focusing on strengths and potential can help your child (and yourself!) to live a joyful life, to excel at school and with friends. 

We all have a different set of strengths, and we can learn how to use those strengths. Take the VIA Strengths Survey to discover which are your top strengths. You will have to register, but the test is free. 

Here you can learn more about the 24 strengths.

Curiosity is linked to academic success, because it involves the motivation and joy of discovery. How can you support your child’s curiosity? Encourage questioning and provide opportunities for exploring. Model curiosity by asking questions yourself. Take the time to listen to questions and answer them. Seek information together. Encourage thinking outside the box.

Guilt and shame are often mixed up. However, they are very different. Guilt refers to something one has done, and shame to how one feels about oneself. Research shows that guilt-proneness may protect children from risky and illegal behavior, whereas shame-proneness is a risk factor.

When your child has done something bad, focus on the behavior and avoid labeling the child. Instead of saying “you are bad for doing this”, say “you have done something bad”. Then explain why the behavior is bad, how it affects other people, and think together about a way to make amends. 

Here you can see a great Ted Talk on shame and vulnerability by Brené Brown.

Research shows that bottling up, dismissing, or in other ways trying to control emotions usually doesn’t work in the long run, and may even lead to both mental and physical problems. On the other hand, accepting all emotions (also the difficult ones) without getting too caught up in them, may dampen your suffering and enhance your wellbeing. 

It’s not the feelings and thoughts that need or even can change. Your behavior is what you can learn to have control over (and the same goes for your child). 

In this video, Russ Harris gives a great tip on how to deal with difficult emotions.